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zarahjoyce) wrote2012-10-08 02:25 pm
zarahjoyce) wrote2012-10-08 02:25 pm
Entry tags:
KRF Fic: Straws
Rating: G
Summary: Because she couldn't afford to lose hope. What would Ryusei think if even she gave up on seeing him again?
Notes: Requested by okaa-san from Tumblr! She gave me this prompt: After High School graduation, Ryusei disappears without a trace. Tomoko thoughts for the whole year he was gone. And Ryusei's thoughts about leaving her behind. This is the result.
Tomoko clutched her straw doll tighter to her chest, tried to look beyond what her eyes could see. She was breathing heavily, and every five seconds or so she would take steps forward, as if being beckoned by something that was still at a distance. There! Something moved, just over there. Could it be...? But no; the man she'd seen turned and disappeared, and he was with a family of his own. He wasn't the person she was looking for. He wasn't the person she was waiting for.
Perhaps Ryusei-san isn't going to come today... But the straw doll in her hands told her otherwise, and she hugged it closer to her, as if the act was going to make him come quicker.
But he didn't.
Just like he didn't appear to her for a whole year now.
But today is a special day! Surely he knows that... right? Tomoko had hoped Ryusei would come; it was her graduation day, after all, and since he didn't come during her first day as a senior, or her birthday, or his, or Christmas Day or even New Year's Day she thought this day would be different. Maybe he'd take time to visit her now; it wasn't often one graduated from school, after all. He knew how much she looked forward to this day. Tomoko clung to this hope, and that's why she had prepared herself, put on her best black dress underneath her graduation gown, her best bow. She had looked into the mirror and chanted, Ryusei-san will come.
And that's when it happened - Tomoko found this straw doll in front of her house, and it had a black rose on the side of its head and Tomoko was so happy, so happy when she had picked it up and thought, Ryusei-san! Ryusei-san is coming back...
She had been on the lookout for him more so than usual; even during graduation rites she kept looking behind her, certain she'd see him there. The student assigned in line behind her began complaining that Tomoko was beginning to creep him out - why did she have to fidget and move so much anyway? - and she didn't know what to say to him but then she didn't have to say anything because at that moment JK nudged the boy out of the way, planted himself firmly between them despite Ohsugi's protests. JK was all smiles and jokes to placate the other students, but then when no one was looking he placed a hand on her arm and said, "Tomo-chan, what's wrong? Are you okay?"
Tomoko shook her head and quietly told him she was all right.
The ceremony started and ended without Ryusei-san being there, and yet Tomoko still thought, maybe after this, maybe--
And that was why she was standing here, alone in the darkness, waiting, still waiting--
"Tomo-chan."
She almost jumped at the sound. Ryusei-san...? But no; her mind registered half-a-second later that it wasn't him behind her. Tomoko turned, tried to hide the disappointment in her features. "JK. Why haven't you gone home yet?"
He shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets. "It's too early," he answered airily. "Besides, there's so many parties to attend - it's our graduation day after all! Miu-sempai said she's throwing one for us at her place. Come on, Tomo-chan - we should celebrate... like this!" JK then did a crazy dance in front of her, and punctuated his statement with a twirl and bright eyes and, "Right?"
Tomoko belatedly realized that he was waiting for an answer from her, and so she nodded slowly. "Mm. Of course." But then she'd gone quiet again, and turned to look behind her, because what if--
--she gasped loudly when JK grabbed her shoulders and forced her to look at him. "--what are you doing?" Tomoko asked, annoyed all of a sudden because--
But then she was looking at JK's face and she noticed how tired it had looked, how sad it seemed, and he hadn't yet removed his hands on her. But then he spoke, and he seemed so... angry and irritated and his aura was giving off puffs of red and-- "Tomoko, don't you see? Ryusei-san isn't coming tonight. He's gone. He's gone!" He gave her a shake that wasn't at all gentle, but after that he let her go - as if ashamed of what he had done. But he didn't apologize; instead he shoved his hands into his pockets again and stepped away from her, looked away. "Ryusei-san's been missing for more than a year now. Gentarou-san tried looking for him for so long but nothing happened - don't you remember? What makes you think he'll be coming back now?"
"Because--" Because she couldn't afford to lose hope. What would Ryusei think if even she gave up on ever seeing him again? Besides-- "--he gave me this, JK," Tomoko said, raising the doll with both hands so he could see it. "I know he did. It's a sign that Ryusei-san hasn't left us yet. He has no reason to! He can't just disappear like he did - and this is proof of that!" No reason to leave them all behind - the club, Subaraboshi, Jirou-san, her--
JK rubbed his temples, sighed. "Where did you see that?"
Did it even matter? Couldn't he see that she was telling the truth? "Outside our house."
He then turned to face her fully. JK seemed to hesitate for a few seconds before saying, "Tomo-chan... that doll? It's from me."
...that couldn't be right. Tomoko's eyes widened and her mouth dropped open in shock. "But--"
"I had to leave it in front of your house instead of giving it to you directly because... because I got a call that dad needed to see me right away. Said he had some wisdom to impart, now that I was graduating." JK scratched the back of his head. "Now that I think about it, maybe I should have left a note on it too, just so you'll know who it's really from." He paused. "Tomo-chan, it's my graduation gift to you."
Tomoko stared at him, trying to gauge for herself if JK was lying. She was sure... she was so sure... had she only been deluding herself? Did she really think the doll was from Ryusei, when all this time... "JK." The straw doll suddenly felt heavy on her arms. Whereas before it was a symbol of all her hopes about Ryusei's whereabouts, now... it was just a doll.
But no, it wasn't just a doll, wasn't it? It was a graduation gift from JK, the one who always stood beside her. The one who had been so patient with her all this time, who had tried to make her laugh whenever he could. "Are you sure?"
"Yes." He nodded and repeated, firmer this time: "Yes. Do you like it?" Then JK waved his own question away. "It doesn't matter. Come on. Yuuki-san and the others are getting worried about you." JK lifted a hand towards her. "Let's go have fun tonight, okay?"
Maybe it was time for her to let go. Maybe she'd waited long enough. Maybe, just for tonight--
Still clutching the doll to her, Tomoko extended one hand and grabbed JK's in a firm grip. Slowly, she nodded.
The smile that he wore was wider and brighter than she had ever seen it. "I'm glad. You won't be sorry, Tomo-chan."
They had walked awhile when she said, "I... don't have a gift for you."
JK laughed and squeezed her hand. "It's all right. You can make it up to me later."
-
"That was a risky move you did, you know."
Ryusei glanced behind him and tried valiantly to contain his annoyance. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Of course you do," Inga said, walking closer towards him. She laid a hand on her hip. "Do you really think you can hide your activities from me? I'm your partner. I know all there is about you. Besides, you can't lose me that easily - I've been at this far longer than you have, remember?" She looked down at her feet, then up at him again. "You dropped something off someone's house. I didn't get a closer look at it, but--"
Ryusei turned to face her, still clinging to that semblance of patience that was rapidly running out. "--you were following me?" Too late did he realize that he had just confirmed her suspicions, just by asking that question.
Then again, like she said he hadn't been in the service for very long. He was bound to make mistakes every now and then - not that he planned on making a habit of it.
"Of course I did. It's my task to do so." To her credit, Inga did look a bit apologetic about it. She sighed. "...Ryusei. If they find out what you've done--"
"Let them." But despite his bravado, he felt a bit of churning in his gut. What he had done - leaving the federation unauthorized, showing up in a civilian-populated area, risking exposure - were grounds that could have him expelled without second thought. And he had given up so much this past year that he couldn't bear the thought of all those sacrifices going to waste.
But a part of him thought the risk he took was well worth it. Ryusei knew what today was, thanks to the intel he was getting. Knew that this day was a special day for her, and just this once he didn't want this day to pass by without giving her something that could tell her he was still here, he was around, just that he couldn't see her, not yet, not yet--
"It's that girl, isn't it?" Inga's voice was soft. "From two years ago. The one you protected from me."
He didn't say anything, merely let out a breath he was holding and started to walk away. But then Ryusei had to stop when she spoke again:
"If they find out about it--" Here Ryusei turned to her, and she was wearing this look-- "It won't be from me."
It took him half-a-second to realized what she meant.
Inga smiled. "It'll be our little secret."
-
Someday he was going to apologize for the lie he told today.
Or maybe not, JK thought, as he tried to push the guilty thoughts away. He smiled when Tomoko let out a laugh at something Gentarou had said. Maybe she doesn't have to know.
Summary: Because she couldn't afford to lose hope. What would Ryusei think if even she gave up on seeing him again?
Notes: Requested by okaa-san from Tumblr! She gave me this prompt: After High School graduation, Ryusei disappears without a trace. Tomoko thoughts for the whole year he was gone. And Ryusei's thoughts about leaving her behind. This is the result.
Tomoko clutched her straw doll tighter to her chest, tried to look beyond what her eyes could see. She was breathing heavily, and every five seconds or so she would take steps forward, as if being beckoned by something that was still at a distance. There! Something moved, just over there. Could it be...? But no; the man she'd seen turned and disappeared, and he was with a family of his own. He wasn't the person she was looking for. He wasn't the person she was waiting for.
Perhaps Ryusei-san isn't going to come today... But the straw doll in her hands told her otherwise, and she hugged it closer to her, as if the act was going to make him come quicker.
But he didn't.
Just like he didn't appear to her for a whole year now.
But today is a special day! Surely he knows that... right? Tomoko had hoped Ryusei would come; it was her graduation day, after all, and since he didn't come during her first day as a senior, or her birthday, or his, or Christmas Day or even New Year's Day she thought this day would be different. Maybe he'd take time to visit her now; it wasn't often one graduated from school, after all. He knew how much she looked forward to this day. Tomoko clung to this hope, and that's why she had prepared herself, put on her best black dress underneath her graduation gown, her best bow. She had looked into the mirror and chanted, Ryusei-san will come.
And that's when it happened - Tomoko found this straw doll in front of her house, and it had a black rose on the side of its head and Tomoko was so happy, so happy when she had picked it up and thought, Ryusei-san! Ryusei-san is coming back...
She had been on the lookout for him more so than usual; even during graduation rites she kept looking behind her, certain she'd see him there. The student assigned in line behind her began complaining that Tomoko was beginning to creep him out - why did she have to fidget and move so much anyway? - and she didn't know what to say to him but then she didn't have to say anything because at that moment JK nudged the boy out of the way, planted himself firmly between them despite Ohsugi's protests. JK was all smiles and jokes to placate the other students, but then when no one was looking he placed a hand on her arm and said, "Tomo-chan, what's wrong? Are you okay?"
Tomoko shook her head and quietly told him she was all right.
The ceremony started and ended without Ryusei-san being there, and yet Tomoko still thought, maybe after this, maybe--
And that was why she was standing here, alone in the darkness, waiting, still waiting--
"Tomo-chan."
She almost jumped at the sound. Ryusei-san...? But no; her mind registered half-a-second later that it wasn't him behind her. Tomoko turned, tried to hide the disappointment in her features. "JK. Why haven't you gone home yet?"
He shrugged and shoved his hands in his pockets. "It's too early," he answered airily. "Besides, there's so many parties to attend - it's our graduation day after all! Miu-sempai said she's throwing one for us at her place. Come on, Tomo-chan - we should celebrate... like this!" JK then did a crazy dance in front of her, and punctuated his statement with a twirl and bright eyes and, "Right?"
Tomoko belatedly realized that he was waiting for an answer from her, and so she nodded slowly. "Mm. Of course." But then she'd gone quiet again, and turned to look behind her, because what if--
--she gasped loudly when JK grabbed her shoulders and forced her to look at him. "--what are you doing?" Tomoko asked, annoyed all of a sudden because--
But then she was looking at JK's face and she noticed how tired it had looked, how sad it seemed, and he hadn't yet removed his hands on her. But then he spoke, and he seemed so... angry and irritated and his aura was giving off puffs of red and-- "Tomoko, don't you see? Ryusei-san isn't coming tonight. He's gone. He's gone!" He gave her a shake that wasn't at all gentle, but after that he let her go - as if ashamed of what he had done. But he didn't apologize; instead he shoved his hands into his pockets again and stepped away from her, looked away. "Ryusei-san's been missing for more than a year now. Gentarou-san tried looking for him for so long but nothing happened - don't you remember? What makes you think he'll be coming back now?"
"Because--" Because she couldn't afford to lose hope. What would Ryusei think if even she gave up on ever seeing him again? Besides-- "--he gave me this, JK," Tomoko said, raising the doll with both hands so he could see it. "I know he did. It's a sign that Ryusei-san hasn't left us yet. He has no reason to! He can't just disappear like he did - and this is proof of that!" No reason to leave them all behind - the club, Subaraboshi, Jirou-san, her--
JK rubbed his temples, sighed. "Where did you see that?"
Did it even matter? Couldn't he see that she was telling the truth? "Outside our house."
He then turned to face her fully. JK seemed to hesitate for a few seconds before saying, "Tomo-chan... that doll? It's from me."
...that couldn't be right. Tomoko's eyes widened and her mouth dropped open in shock. "But--"
"I had to leave it in front of your house instead of giving it to you directly because... because I got a call that dad needed to see me right away. Said he had some wisdom to impart, now that I was graduating." JK scratched the back of his head. "Now that I think about it, maybe I should have left a note on it too, just so you'll know who it's really from." He paused. "Tomo-chan, it's my graduation gift to you."
Tomoko stared at him, trying to gauge for herself if JK was lying. She was sure... she was so sure... had she only been deluding herself? Did she really think the doll was from Ryusei, when all this time... "JK." The straw doll suddenly felt heavy on her arms. Whereas before it was a symbol of all her hopes about Ryusei's whereabouts, now... it was just a doll.
But no, it wasn't just a doll, wasn't it? It was a graduation gift from JK, the one who always stood beside her. The one who had been so patient with her all this time, who had tried to make her laugh whenever he could. "Are you sure?"
"Yes." He nodded and repeated, firmer this time: "Yes. Do you like it?" Then JK waved his own question away. "It doesn't matter. Come on. Yuuki-san and the others are getting worried about you." JK lifted a hand towards her. "Let's go have fun tonight, okay?"
Maybe it was time for her to let go. Maybe she'd waited long enough. Maybe, just for tonight--
Still clutching the doll to her, Tomoko extended one hand and grabbed JK's in a firm grip. Slowly, she nodded.
The smile that he wore was wider and brighter than she had ever seen it. "I'm glad. You won't be sorry, Tomo-chan."
They had walked awhile when she said, "I... don't have a gift for you."
JK laughed and squeezed her hand. "It's all right. You can make it up to me later."
-
"That was a risky move you did, you know."
Ryusei glanced behind him and tried valiantly to contain his annoyance. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Of course you do," Inga said, walking closer towards him. She laid a hand on her hip. "Do you really think you can hide your activities from me? I'm your partner. I know all there is about you. Besides, you can't lose me that easily - I've been at this far longer than you have, remember?" She looked down at her feet, then up at him again. "You dropped something off someone's house. I didn't get a closer look at it, but--"
Ryusei turned to face her, still clinging to that semblance of patience that was rapidly running out. "--you were following me?" Too late did he realize that he had just confirmed her suspicions, just by asking that question.
Then again, like she said he hadn't been in the service for very long. He was bound to make mistakes every now and then - not that he planned on making a habit of it.
"Of course I did. It's my task to do so." To her credit, Inga did look a bit apologetic about it. She sighed. "...Ryusei. If they find out what you've done--"
"Let them." But despite his bravado, he felt a bit of churning in his gut. What he had done - leaving the federation unauthorized, showing up in a civilian-populated area, risking exposure - were grounds that could have him expelled without second thought. And he had given up so much this past year that he couldn't bear the thought of all those sacrifices going to waste.
But a part of him thought the risk he took was well worth it. Ryusei knew what today was, thanks to the intel he was getting. Knew that this day was a special day for her, and just this once he didn't want this day to pass by without giving her something that could tell her he was still here, he was around, just that he couldn't see her, not yet, not yet--
"It's that girl, isn't it?" Inga's voice was soft. "From two years ago. The one you protected from me."
He didn't say anything, merely let out a breath he was holding and started to walk away. But then Ryusei had to stop when she spoke again:
"If they find out about it--" Here Ryusei turned to her, and she was wearing this look-- "It won't be from me."
It took him half-a-second to realized what she meant.
Inga smiled. "It'll be our little secret."
-
Someday he was going to apologize for the lie he told today.
Or maybe not, JK thought, as he tried to push the guilty thoughts away. He smiled when Tomoko let out a laugh at something Gentarou had said. Maybe she doesn't have to know.