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zarahjoyce) wrote2011-02-06 05:45 am
zarahjoyce) wrote2011-02-06 05:45 am
Entry tags:
Angel fic
Title: Five Reasons Wes and Cordy Never Dated
Rating: G
Notes: for the awesome![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
whomever who requested for this. Pretend it makes sense, okay?
Five Reasons Wes and Cordy Never Dated
One
Cordelia arrived ten minutes late at the boutique where she worked, and because of that her bitch of a manager started bitching at her for no reason.
Please, like there was someone just itching to go in a boutique the very minute they open? Hell, no! She would have said that, except the last time she talked back Cordelia got suspended for a week with no pay, and the 'pay' part was why she took this job in the first place.
So she pasted on her biggest smile and nodded and sweetly promised to never be late again, while inside she cursed every curseable being in the universe that ever lived.
Twenty minutes later, and Cordelia spotted a woman with a tacky over-sized hat fawning over the size two dresses. Like you're going to fit into one, lady. Then again, dreaming is free. "May I help you, Ma'am?"
"I certainly hope so, darling. You think they have a dress just like this in Italy? You think we should just buy me one over there?" And then the woman turned and lowered her freakishly over-sized sunglasses and--
Dear god in heaven.
"...Mother?"
Two
“Short? No, on the contrary, quite enormous... and powerful. More of a yellow green. And it seems lately to be secreting some sort of viscous, yellow fluid.”
Angel looked at a yellow blob on Wesley’s jacket. “Like that?”
They both looked up, and the demon that had been clinging to the ceiling dropped down between them. It attacked Wesley, slashing at his arm - there was so much blood - and throwing him across the room. Dazed, he could only shake and stare at his side, where a huge chunk of his flesh had been ripped off.
And Angel, his senses heavily assaulted with the sight and smell of human blood, had become slightly disoriented. Taking advantage of this, the Kungai demon then delivered some devastating punches that ended with the vampire on the ground. Moments later, the demon was gone.
"A-Angel?" Wesley's voice was tiny and it scared him even more. "Angel?"
The vampire didn't stir.
Wesley closed his eyes, just for a moment, and comforted himself with the thought that he would be saved, once the vampire came to. Just a few minutes, really... it wouldn't be long, now...
When Angel opened his eyes, Wesley was dead.
Three
"My god, I'm like so immensely tired. Seriously, I am." Cordelia dramatically draped herself on one chair and sighed. "Angel definitely needs to pay me twice for this. I'm like doing double-duty here! Seer and housekeeper."
Wesley shook his head at her. "It's not like you've had any visions today, Cordy."
"What's your point? And whose side are you on, anyway?"
But before Wesley could answer, Cordelia had raised one hand and said, "No need to answer. I know you're on Angel's side since you're such a suck-up. Speaking of suck-ups, Gunn's hot, don't you think?"
"...what?"
"Yeah. Thought so." Cordelia grinned and straightened herself. "He has this whole... aura about him. Like, an 'I can protect you' aura. 'No harm can come to you whilst I'm here' aura. So dreamy."
Wesley raised his brows. "Are you telling me that I don't have that kind of aura?"
"You really want me to answer that?"
"...no. Carry on."
Cordelia winked saucily at him. "I think I will. Starting with asking him out on a date."
Four
"So..." Cordelia squinted as she looked at Wesley's outfit from head to toe. "Is it just me, or do you have a habit of dressing up as though we're about to bury you? Though of course, with our line of work that isn't an impossibility." She shrugged. "Maybe this is you being all boy-scouty? Do you even have boy scouts in England, or do you call them like, lad scouts, or something? Scone scouts?"
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," Wesley proudly proclaimed. "Besides, my manner of dressing is hardly your concern. Perhaps you should just mind your own business, Cordelia."
"I would, except you're in my business. As in you work in it, too." Cordelia threw a questioning look Angel's way. "Remind me why we hired him, again? I don't remember ever needing a mascot!"
"I beg your pardon! If you must know--"
"I'm going to bed," Angel said, shrugging off his coat and heading to the elevator, certain that the bickering would not end for at least another thirty minutes.
He was right.
Five
"So..." Cordelia grinned at him. "Why do you think we never dated, Wes? I mean, I'm hot and you're okay-looking to a certain degree. I think if we worked on it, we could've been something."
Wesley chuckled. "Thank you. Really, Cordy." He took her hands, squeezed them and said, "Well, to be honest? The more I got to know you, the less I wanted to date you."
She snatched her hands and slapped him on the arm. "You take that back."
"It's true, though! Think of it in the context of siblings. Most siblings grew up together and would die for each other, but I hardly think they'd consider dating each other." He then paused and added, "Unless of course they are into that kind of thing--"
"Perv." But she smiled at him brightly. "So. Siblings, huh."
"I think we work perfectly well like that. A rather odd, mismatched pair if I ever saw one, but a pair nonetheless. Besides, you're too high-maintenance for me."
"And you're too nerdy for my taste."
"Precisely."
Rating: G
Notes: for the awesome
whomever who requested for this. Pretend it makes sense, okay?One
Cordelia arrived ten minutes late at the boutique where she worked, and because of that her bitch of a manager started bitching at her for no reason.
Please, like there was someone just itching to go in a boutique the very minute they open? Hell, no! She would have said that, except the last time she talked back Cordelia got suspended for a week with no pay, and the 'pay' part was why she took this job in the first place.
So she pasted on her biggest smile and nodded and sweetly promised to never be late again, while inside she cursed every curseable being in the universe that ever lived.
Twenty minutes later, and Cordelia spotted a woman with a tacky over-sized hat fawning over the size two dresses. Like you're going to fit into one, lady. Then again, dreaming is free. "May I help you, Ma'am?"
"I certainly hope so, darling. You think they have a dress just like this in Italy? You think we should just buy me one over there?" And then the woman turned and lowered her freakishly over-sized sunglasses and--
Dear god in heaven.
"...Mother?"
Two
“Short? No, on the contrary, quite enormous... and powerful. More of a yellow green. And it seems lately to be secreting some sort of viscous, yellow fluid.”
Angel looked at a yellow blob on Wesley’s jacket. “Like that?”
They both looked up, and the demon that had been clinging to the ceiling dropped down between them. It attacked Wesley, slashing at his arm - there was so much blood - and throwing him across the room. Dazed, he could only shake and stare at his side, where a huge chunk of his flesh had been ripped off.
And Angel, his senses heavily assaulted with the sight and smell of human blood, had become slightly disoriented. Taking advantage of this, the Kungai demon then delivered some devastating punches that ended with the vampire on the ground. Moments later, the demon was gone.
"A-Angel?" Wesley's voice was tiny and it scared him even more. "Angel?"
The vampire didn't stir.
Wesley closed his eyes, just for a moment, and comforted himself with the thought that he would be saved, once the vampire came to. Just a few minutes, really... it wouldn't be long, now...
When Angel opened his eyes, Wesley was dead.
Three
"My god, I'm like so immensely tired. Seriously, I am." Cordelia dramatically draped herself on one chair and sighed. "Angel definitely needs to pay me twice for this. I'm like doing double-duty here! Seer and housekeeper."
Wesley shook his head at her. "It's not like you've had any visions today, Cordy."
"What's your point? And whose side are you on, anyway?"
But before Wesley could answer, Cordelia had raised one hand and said, "No need to answer. I know you're on Angel's side since you're such a suck-up. Speaking of suck-ups, Gunn's hot, don't you think?"
"...what?"
"Yeah. Thought so." Cordelia grinned and straightened herself. "He has this whole... aura about him. Like, an 'I can protect you' aura. 'No harm can come to you whilst I'm here' aura. So dreamy."
Wesley raised his brows. "Are you telling me that I don't have that kind of aura?"
"You really want me to answer that?"
"...no. Carry on."
Cordelia winked saucily at him. "I think I will. Starting with asking him out on a date."
Four
"So..." Cordelia squinted as she looked at Wesley's outfit from head to toe. "Is it just me, or do you have a habit of dressing up as though we're about to bury you? Though of course, with our line of work that isn't an impossibility." She shrugged. "Maybe this is you being all boy-scouty? Do you even have boy scouts in England, or do you call them like, lad scouts, or something? Scone scouts?"
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that," Wesley proudly proclaimed. "Besides, my manner of dressing is hardly your concern. Perhaps you should just mind your own business, Cordelia."
"I would, except you're in my business. As in you work in it, too." Cordelia threw a questioning look Angel's way. "Remind me why we hired him, again? I don't remember ever needing a mascot!"
"I beg your pardon! If you must know--"
"I'm going to bed," Angel said, shrugging off his coat and heading to the elevator, certain that the bickering would not end for at least another thirty minutes.
He was right.
Five
"So..." Cordelia grinned at him. "Why do you think we never dated, Wes? I mean, I'm hot and you're okay-looking to a certain degree. I think if we worked on it, we could've been something."
Wesley chuckled. "Thank you. Really, Cordy." He took her hands, squeezed them and said, "Well, to be honest? The more I got to know you, the less I wanted to date you."
She snatched her hands and slapped him on the arm. "You take that back."
"It's true, though! Think of it in the context of siblings. Most siblings grew up together and would die for each other, but I hardly think they'd consider dating each other." He then paused and added, "Unless of course they are into that kind of thing--"
"Perv." But she smiled at him brightly. "So. Siblings, huh."
"I think we work perfectly well like that. A rather odd, mismatched pair if I ever saw one, but a pair nonetheless. Besides, you're too high-maintenance for me."
"And you're too nerdy for my taste."
"Precisely."